AAja Hansle!!!!!!




2 Sardar
2 sardaron ko 2 bomb mile,
1st Sardar: chal police ko de k aate hain.
2 sardar: agar koi bomb raaste me phat gaya to?
1st sardar: jhoot bol denge ki 1 hi mila tha !


Sardar and Police
Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phaasi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police: Kyon hasn rahe ho?
Sardar: Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hun.



Doctor And Sardar .
Sardar 2 doctor: Mujhe 1 problem hai
Dr: Kya?
Sardar: Baat karte waqt aadmi dikhai nahi deta
Dr: aisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt

Sardar and Home
Man: Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kya karte ho?
Sardar: AC k paas ja k baith jata hun
Man: Agar phir bhi garmi lage to?
Sardar: To A/C on kar leta hun

Sardar and prayer
A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
"He Vahe Guru meri lottery lagade."
After 11 years Vahe Guru angrily appeared & said,"Khote de puttar 1
vari ticket to le le"

The real
Ek sardar ki chatri me hole tha,
kisine pucha, umbrella me hole kyun?
Sardar bola, Oye baarish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega

Sardar and Hitler
Hitler says, "There is no word like IMPOSSIBLE in my dictionary"
Sardar says: Ab bolne se kya faayda? "Jub kharidi thi tab hi check
karna tha na"

Sardar and Computer
Sardar: Yaar mujhe 1 hathora or keel chahiye computer k liye.
Sales man: Magar computer me inka kya kaam?
Sardar: Oye yaar mujhe computer me windows lagani hai.

Two Sardars
1st sardar: oye agar neend na aaye to kya kia jaaye?
2nd Sardar: Neend ka intizar karne se achha hai ki banda soo hi jaye
1 sardar rail ki patri per so gaya .
1 aadmi ne kaha kya kar rahe ho? Train aayegi to mar jaoge!
Sardar: Mere uper se hawai jahaaz guzar gaya to kuch nahi hua, train
kya cheez hai?

Sardar and Practical Exam
In bio practical:
Examiner: Tell me the name of this bird by seeing its legs only?
Sardar: I don't know..
Examiner: You are failed, what's your name?
Sardar: See my legs & tell my name

संता और बंता



संता और बंता अमेरिका गये|उन्हें होटल की १२६वीं मंजिल पर कमरा मिला|पहले दिन सैर-सपाटे से वापस लौटे तो पता चला की होटल की बिजली गुल है|मजबूरी में दोनों सीडियां चड़ने लगे|१० वीं मंजिल पर पहुंचे तो
संता ने बंता से कहा-यार,मुझे कुछ कहना है|
बंता -बोल ना|

संता-नहीं बाद में बताऊंगा|
जब ५० वीं मंजिल पे पहुंचे तो
संता ने कहा की मुझे कुछ कहना है,लेकिन बंता के पूछने पर उसने फिर वही कहा की बाद में बतायेगा |जब दोनों १०० वीं मंजिल पर पहूंचे तो संता ने धीरे से कुछ कहा और बंता के पूछने पर कुछ नहीं कह दिया|आखिरकार दोनों अपनी मंजिल पर पहुंचे तो संता ने फिर कुछ कहने की गुजारिश की|
बंता ने कहा की अब बोल नहीं तो तुझे नीचे फैंक दूंगा|संता डरते -डरते बंता से बोला-यार कमरे की चाबी तो नीचे ही रह गई|

Sardar jokes...


Sardar Jokes

Santa : I tried your number so many times, it always said 'Switched Off'!"

Banta : Nahi Pape, it's my HELLO TUNE!


Daku Mangal Singh Banta Ke Ghar Mein Ghus Ayaa..

Daku : Sona kahan hai, Jaldi Bataao..!

Banta : Pura Ghar Khali Hai Malko, Jithe Marzi So Jao!


Santa : Kaisi Sabzi Banai Hai, Bilkul Gobar Jaisa Swad Hai !

Jasmeet : Hey bhagwan! Na Jane Inhone Kya-Kya Kha Ke Dekha Hua Hai.

Gobar Ka Swad Bhi Pata Hai..!


Banta : Praji, Jab Main Paida Hua Tha To Military Walon Ne 21 Topein Chalayeen Thi.

Santa : Kamaal Hai ! Sab Ka Nishana Kayse Chook Gaya ..?


Santa meets his friend Bunta

Santa : A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B, A & B...!

Bunta : Oye, Iska Matlab ?

Santa : Kuch Nahin Yaar, I Mean Long Time No C..!


Santa : Drinking-n-Driving Dono Nalo Naal Nai Ho Sakde.

Banta : Kyoo Ji ?

Santa : Je SpeedBbreaker Aa Gaya Taa Peg Dul Jau.


Phone Ki Ganti Baji.

Santa : Phone Mere Liye Ho To Kehna Mein Ghar Pe Nahin Hoon.

Jasmeet : Wo Ghar Pe Hain.

Santa : Maine Mana Kiya Tha Ke...

Jasmeet : Phone Mere Liye Tha!

Santa : Aapne nurse Bahut Changi Rakhi Hai, Uska Haath Lagtey Hi Mein Theek Ho Gaya.

Doctor: Jaanta Hoon, Thappad Ki Awaaz Mujhe Bhi Sunai Di Thi.


Santa : Oh Yaar Main Badi Mushkil Mein Hoon...

Meri Biwi Mujhse Ek Pappi Ka Ek Rupeya Leti Hai..!

Banta : Oh Yaar Tu Bada Lucky Hai, Auron Se To Woh 5 Rupye Leti Hai.


Santa : Yaar! Main Apna Purse Ghar Bhool Aaya, Mainu 1000 Rs Chahide Si.

Banta : Dost Hi Dost De Kam Aunda Hai, Le 10 Rs, Riksha Kar Te Purse Le Aa.

Banta : Wo Ladki Deaf Lagti Hai. Main Kuch Kehta Hoon, Woh Kuch Aur Hi Bolti Hai.

Santa : Kaise?

Banta : Maine Kaha I Luv U, To Woh Boli 'Maine Kal Hi Naye Sandal kharide hain'

A crow shits on Banta. Preeto gives tissue paper to him.

Banta: Koi Fhayda Nahin, Kauwa Toh Udd Gaya ..!

Santa : When I get mad at you,you never fight back.How do you control your anger?

Jasmeet : I clean the toilet bowl.

Santa : How does that help?

Jasmeet : I use your toothbrush!

Sardar & his wife buy coffee in a shop.

Sardar says... Drink quickly..... .

Wife asks why...

sardar says hot coffee Rs5 and cold coffee Rs10


Only Married Men will Understand This..

Husband: Aaj khane mein kya banaogi??
Wife: Jo aap kaho.


H: Dal chawal bana lo?
W: Abhi kal hi to khaye the.


H: To sabji roti bana lo.
W: Bacche nahi khayenge.


H: To chhole puri bana lo.
W: Mujhe heavy heavy lagta hai.


H: Eggs bhurji bana lo.
W: Aaj guruvaar hai?


H: Paraanthe ?
W: Raat ko paraanthe kaun khata hai?


H: Hotel se mangwa lete hain??
W: Roz roz hotel ka nahi khana chahiye.


H: Kadhi chawal?
W: Dahi nahi hai.


H: Idli sambar?
W: Usme time lagega. Pehle bolna chahiye tha na?


H: Maggie hi bana lo, usme time nahi lagega.
W: Woh koi meal thodi hai? Pet nahi bharta.


H: Phir ab kya banaogi?
W: Jo aap kaho.